Page 25

Yet the third spoke with a piqued look
In a tone, that I will never forget:

Operating would not remove my ailment,

And furthermore, it held no interest for him!

--

My one solace in these days

Was that, since I was in such a state,

I was allowed to say so many curse words,

I could say anything I wanted.

It changed my tune back to cheerful and jolly -

But the others suffered under it.

Page 23 and 24

Dyspeptic.

In the beginning the illness wasn't so bad,

I was likely to recover on my own.

But as my relatives, in herds,

assumed to show their caring -

I began to have stomach troubles.

I lost some pounds. -

Now I absorbed salt from Carlsbad en masse,

guzzled baking soda and seltzer like a fool,

drank castor oil from a saucer -

and my gastric flu was finished!

--

In this most dire of episodes

I managed, naturally, to have everything go amiss:
I consulted various doctors,

and they all had various methods:

The first had a healing goal

He prescribed me a pink medicine:

The medicine gradually went away,

The gastric flu - that stayed.

The second examined my tongue and pharynx,

Felt my pulse and announced sophisticatedly:

"I declare you completely healthy,

But - come again tomorrow!"

Page 21 and 22

Dyspeptic.

[Editor's note: Dyspepsia (from the Greek "δυς-" (Dys-), meaning hard or difficult, and "πέψη" (Pepse), meaning digestion) refers to disorders of the stomach involving symptoms such as heartburn, nausea, pain, or general discomfort. From Wikipedia.]

Page 19 and 20

Thus, if all this did not exist on earth,
What would, exactly - be the purpose of a satirist?!" -

That he spoke, then disappeared into the dark night. -

I was soon red and soon sick,
"Surprised yet again,
I hadn't thought of that! -
Man alive!" this crossed my mind:
"I shouldn't write any more poems?!
And the world ought not to abide satirists?!
That is not possible, that cannot be!"

And in my cheeks I felt my blood rushing,
And I felt a hotness burning in my heart,
"No, no," I shouted out, "I'll admit this:
I have erred! Morality is good!!
It is the holiest of earth's good things,
We all, all live because of it,
hail it and its brave guardian!" -
And off I went with apprehensive steps,
To ask for the lawyer's apology,
And humbly I knocked on his door.

I would speak just like a book

And repentfully grasp his knees -

But he had a lady visitor --

So, regretfully - I wasn't admitted.

[End of chapter 1: The Invention of Morality.]

Page 18

The newspapers already accuse me so,
I lacked the holy wrath,
But now a way and a goal beckon me!
Smash me if you will, but I must change them!" -

"On the contrary!" said Satan frigidly,
"I value such unselfish action!
Always combat only the false morals,
When your outrage is so high and sincere,
But first deliberate once more,
Whether morality - is actually so bad!

Because of morality the whole world lives,
that is, it holds mankind together.
Because of morality we have both
high and low officers of morality.
Because of morality we have censors,
the noble-born lawyers.
Because of morality we have the common people,
the marriage brokers and newlyweds.
Because of morality we have tenants of virtue,
the fortune hunters, the counsel daughters,
Hypocrites and saps live in good silence,
Falseness and foolishness live - and you live, too! ---

Page 17

So spoke the devil. - But I began to tremble
as a heroic plan bubbled within.
Never before in my entire life
had this magnificent feeling occurred.
"Satan!" I yelled with a haughty gesture,
"You have measured with great cunning
the egotism of the giants of the world.
But you have forgotten one thing!
One thing, Satan, that you forgot,
That stands here before you in shame and outrage:
The satirist is he, the uncorrupted poet,
He who knows no selfish interests.
He who would reveal your dirty pact!
I want to speak to young and old
and wish to accomplish my high duty.
And wish to hold a mirror up to the world.

I'll bellow in the ear of humankind
And drive them to a spring of genuine truth. -

Page 15/16

Thus, we created a monopoly
much like tobacco and alcohol,
as the state wore the people out,
with a design - called "wedlock."

The consumer must pay his taxes,
Moreover, he needs a church blessing,
But he can't do it all,
So - he falls into my claws!

The state first deliberated for a while,
Because they are always somewhat sluggish,
The church immediately understood me. -
So we kept humankind in groups:
Taxmen, clerks, and clerics -

And in doing so, I still stand strong!"